There are few skills that can elevate you to the rarified status of über-geek as quickly as being able to speak a geeky language. By learning Dothraki, Elvish, R’lyehian, or City Speak, you will definitely have a leg up on those who only speak common. However, there is one constructed language that will put you at the top of the heap of bilingual (or multilingual) geeks: Klingon.
Fearsome-sounding and focused heavily on war and space travel, Klingon is a difficult language to learn. Still, that doesn’t stop many from trying to learn or teach. The Klingon language has been featured in educational books, software, and even literature, in attempts to get others to become conversant. Still, Wikipedia claims only about a dozen people in the whole galaxy are fluent in Klingon, so where does that leave the rest of us?
If you just want a phrase or two to throw around and prove your geek status, perhaps a new book from Chronicle Books will help pave the way. How to Speak Klingon: Essential Phrases for the Intergalactic Traveler is sure to provide you with the phrases you need and the proper pronunciation to get you through any social encounter or business transaction.
The book is arranged by ten settings (Klingon for a birthday party) and provides suggestions for phrases useful in these situations, descriptions of what you might see or expect and the book even includes an electronic module that repeats 10 important phrases so you can practice your Klingon before heading out to Qo’noS, where you’ll want to compliment your host with a thoughtful “jlmoqchu’; Qun blrur” (You bludgeon divinely) or offer an insightful “qab pagh qech ‘ach Hegh qotlh ‘op” (There are no bad ideas, only ideas meriting death).
From office banter to restaurant and theater outings, How to Speak Klingon will have you covered. Just be careful the next time you travel, intergalactically or internationally. Telling a TSA agent “leng chaw’? ro’wlj ‘oH leng chaw’wlj’e’!”* might just land you in prison.
Disclosure: GeekDad received a sample of this book.
* Passport? My fist is my passport!