One contender is a man in an elf suit. The other is a boy in a bunny suit. By the end of today, only one will survive to be declared the geekiest holiday movie character ever.
Buddy the Elf defeats John McClane (51% – 49%) — Just four votes kept Buddy from being an angry elf, but he did make it through the seven levels of the Candy Cane forest to emerge from the Lincoln Tunnel victorious. Detective McClane finally ran out of time. And C4.
Ralphie defeats Jack Skellington (58% – 42%) — Although much closer than his first-round battle, Ralphie had this matchup decoded from the start. He triple-dog-dared the Pumpkin King to out-geek him, and then left him stuck to a frozen flag pole when the bell rang. This time, Jack didn’t get back up after being shot down.
Today, the two remaining fictional characters conclude their respective journeys to geek immortality, as determined by popular vote on Quipol. Winner take all. Let’s hope for a snowball fight.
Round Three: The Finals
Buddy the Elf
Dresses in colorful clothes
As a human in an elf’s world, Buddy couldn’t make quota. He may be a cotton-headed ninnymuggins in Santa’s workshop, but he can sure work the bricks in Gimbel’s department store. In Elf (2003, $40M), Buddy shows his versatility with paper, lite-brite and snow.
Wired: Human catapult for snowballs
Tired: Poorly caffeinated, given inexperience with coffee
Uses colorful language
The hero from A Christmas Story (1983, $9M) is a keen strategist with a high success rate. He is a connoisseur of soap — a byproduct of his Fudge-ing language — and a crack cryptologist.
Wired: Didn’t shoot his eye out
Tired: Slave to rules, abandons friend to conform