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Tag: puns

Daily #DadJoke for March 30, 2016

March 30, 2016December 13, 2017Judd Schorr0

Daily #DadJoke for March 30, 2016: On this day in history, the shovel was invented…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 29, 2016

March 29, 2016Judd Schorr0

Daily #DadJoke for March 29, 2016: To the man in the wheelchair that stole my ghillie suit..

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Daily #DadJoke for March 28, 2016

March 28, 2016Judd Schorr0

Today, I turned away a door-to-door coffin salesperson.

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Daily #DadJoke for March 25, 2016

March 25, 2016Judd Schorr0

Daily #DadJoke for March 25, 2016: I found out today that I am colorblind. This was completely unexpected…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 22, 2016:

March 22, 2016Judd Schorr0

What do they call Miley Cyrus in Canada?

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Daily #DadJoke for March 21, 2016

March 21, 2016Judd Schorr0

Daily #DadJoke for March 21, 2016: A truck carrying 5000 packages of Sudafed(tm) turned over on Route 400 in Georgia this afternoon…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 20, 2016

March 20, 2016Judd Schorr0

You can borrow any of Rick Astley’s Disney movie collection–any of them. Except for one film…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 19, 2016

March 19, 2016December 13, 2017Judd Schorr0

After giving my camera to a group consisting of an Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German, I posed and asked…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 18, 2016

March 18, 2016Judd Schorr0

When they run backwards, wind turbines don’t break…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 17, 2016

March 17, 2016Judd Schorr0

I went to the circus to see the talking pony…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 16, 2016

March 16, 2016Judd Schorr0

So what if I don’t know what the word “apocalypse” means?

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Daily #DadJoke for March 15, 2016

March 15, 2016Judd Schorr0

Tectonic plates are unfailingly polite…

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Daily #DadJoke for Pi Day, 2016

March 14, 2016Judd Schorr0

I asked my son, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

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Daily #DadJoke for March 13, 2016

March 13, 2016Judd Schorr0

All by himself, a tightrope artist traversed a line across the Han River in China…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 12, 2016

March 12, 2016Judd Schorr0

I can’t eat breakfast without two slices of whole wheat…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 11, 2016

March 11, 2016Judd Schorr0

A pirate enters a bar wearing a paper towel, looking sad…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 10, 2016

March 10, 2016Judd Schorr0

Did you hear about the mathematician that was afraid of negative numbers?

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Daily #DadJoke for March 09, 2016

March 9, 2016Judd Schorr0

When you alphabetize all of the food in your fridge, it’s called OCD…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 08, 2016

March 8, 2016Judd Schorr0

Today, the 8th of March, is National Pancake Day…

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Daily #DadJoke for March 07, 2016

March 7, 2016Judd Schorr0

A man tells his doctor, “Doctor, I am addicted to Twitter.”

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Daily #DadJoke for March 06, 2016

March 6, 2016Judd Schorr0

Why does Ikea have mandatory “all hands” meetings each morning?

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Daily #DadJoke for March 05, 2016

March 5, 2016Judd Schorr0

The human cannonball wasn’t fired from his job as previously thought–actually, he quit.

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Daily #DadJoke for March 04, 2016

March 4, 2016Judd Schorr0

Two hours before giving birth to our son, my wife yelled “Can’t! Won’t! Shouldn’t! Couldn’t! Isn’t! They’re! Don’t!”

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Daily #DadJoke for March 03, 2016

March 3, 2016Judd Schorr0

Why can’t ladies ask their male siblings for help?

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Daily #DadJoke for March 02, 2016

March 2, 2016Judd Schorr0

Why are Blitzen, Donner, and Comet always soaking wet?

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Daily #DadJoke for March 01, 2016

March 1, 2016December 16, 2017Judd Schorr0

My daughter, Nora, saw a sign that read “Watch Batteries Installed – $5.00″…

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Daily #DadJoke for February 29, 2016

February 29, 2016Judd Schorr0

During the great flood, where did Noah keep the bees?

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Daily #DadJoke for February 28, 2016

February 28, 2016Judd Schorr0

Why should you never mention the number 288?

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Daily #DadJoke for February 27, 2016

February 27, 2016December 13, 2017Judd Schorr0

I just watched a documentary on how construction workers piece together iron girders…

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Daily #DadJoke for February 26, 2016

February 26, 2016Judd Schorr0

Why do cows wear bells?

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