As a parent, I never stop thinking about who my kids are looking up to, and what they are exposed to. I worry about young boys being held to unhealthy social norms. Don’t cry. Man up. Don’t be a girl about it. The language used here demeans everyone, and leaves little room for healthy personal growth. We have to make special efforts to nurture our boys and help them grow into great adults. But we aren’t there every moment. They read, watch TV, and explore the Internet every day. In that way, it can be hard to find great role models for our sons.
I came across an article from Common Sense Media titled 10 Great Role Models for Boys. It had some really great advice, and some surprising suggestions. The article covers role models from Neil DeGrase Tyson to Ash Ketchum. Big Bang Theory‘s Dr. Leonard Hofstadr even made the list. The age range covered by the article is from pre-school to young adult. Not everything was great for my son, but many things were great for us.
Check out the article, reprinted in its entirety below.
Parenting takes a community, and we all have different views. I’d love to hear who you would suggest. Feel free to share your role models in our comments!
10 Great Role Models for Boys
Let’s play fill in the blank: “You swing like a g—“; “Boys don’t c–“; “Be a m–.” If you think it’s easy to guess the answers, imagine how boys feel. From chisel-chested action stars to scorched-earth video game heroes to tough-talking TV guys, the media’s images, characters, and messages are loud and clear: to be a man, you must be intimidating, stoic, and domineering.
These cultural stereotypes are not only dated, they’re not true. And they can limit boys from developing their full potential as sensitive, nurturing, and authentic human beings.
But new role models are emerging, in both traditional and new media. Alternative entertainment that doesn’t stick to the same old script, such as indie games, podcasts, and YouTube shows, presents characters with depth, feelings, and flaws. Fathers are being shown in more nurturing domestic roles. And even boys themselves are getting an opportunity to voice their beliefs, and they’re rejecting the old stereotypes.
Here are 10 male role models that are truly inspiring.
Daniel Tiger, Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood. If you want your preschooler to learn positive traits such as loyalty, compassion, and even emotional flexibility, Daniel Tiger is your man — ahem, tiger.
Ash Ketchum, Pokémon. Watching Ash’s personal journey from stubborn and brash amateur to patient Pokémon trainer, loyal friend, and wise strategist, kids can learn the value of perseverance.
Manny Delgado, Modern Family. Played by Rico Rodriguez, Manny is the poster child for giving 110 percent to anything you believe in. When he falls off the horse (for example, gets rejected by a love interest), he climbs right back on, demonstrating an enviable level of determination and resilience.
Ansel Elgort, Insurgent, The Fault in Our Stars. This born-and-bred New Yorker defies the tough city-kid stereotype. He’s a model of sensitivity and support, both in his movies and in real life, where he never fails to give props to his costar Shailene Woodley. Nor is he afraid to tap dance with Jimmy Fallon.
Rhett & Link, Good Mythical Morning. These talented and creative comedy partners find ways to riff off each other without insults, put-downs, or boundary pushing. In an age when lots of kids are eager to practice their video skills, Rhett & Link demonstrate how to do respectable online entertainment.
Neil DeGrasse Tyson, Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey. Not many astrophysicists have the charm, telegenic looks, or gift of explaining complex concepts in easy-to-understand terms. But Neil DeGrasse Tyson — who famously championed the downgrading of Pluto to a dwarf planet against very heavy opposition — has made a personal and professional career of going against the grain.
Dr. Leonard Hofstadtr, The Big Bang Theory. Played by Johnny Galecki, Leonard is the glue that holds a group of ragtag misfits together. He’s a brilliant scientist, but he doesn’t act like he’s better than other people (the way his infamous nerdy roommate Sheldon does). He looks for qualities that unite people rather than divide them.
Michael Sam, Dancing with the Stars. The first openly gay football player to be drafted into the NFL, Sam has achieved a lot through hard work, defying expectations, and being true to himself.
John and Hank Green, The Fault in Our Stars, Paper Towns, the VlogBrothers. Through John’s books, the brothers’ vlogs, and their joint personal appearances throughout the country, these two have connected to — and provided meaning for — the trickiest of groups: tween and teens. They send the message that living fully means facing uncomfortable issues, giving teens permission to express their messy, complicated selves.
Terry Crews, Brooklyn Nine-Nine. This former NFL player looks tough, but he’s far from a stereotypical macho man. In his book, Manhood, he reveals that he’s a feminist and criticizes the idea of the “man code,” which justifies treating women as trophies.
I think I argue against Leonard from TBBT. He treats his friends contemptuously – even if he has to put up with a lot from Sheldon. And he treats women very badly. Everything is always Penny’s fault – he gets angry at her for the smallest thing, blows it way out of proportion and then she apologizes. He puts her down for the lack of education; he puts down her new job; he is basically a mass of insecurities and he takes them all out on her. I’m sorry, but I have always felt he was a Gary Stu for Lorre.