We’ve all seen the ornaments Hallmark comes out with every year, and to be fair, some of them are excellent. There are a few Star Trek ones each year, and Star Wars ones, and other somewhat geeky ones, but they’re mainstream — and while there’s nothing inherently wrong with mainstream Christmas decorations, we are geeks and geeks tend to prefer things that are at least a little outside of mainstream.
So, as a public service, and because it’s fun, here is our list of the top 10 geeky Christmas decorations we could find. Please let us know if we’ve left out your favorite by leaving a comment.
10. Captain Kirk With Ripped Shirt Statue
The only reason this isn’t higher on the list, because it’s completely awesome, is that it may not actually be available for sale. It’s listed on designer Kurt Adler’s website, but we couldn’t find anywhere to actually buy it. Nevertheless, the idea of Kirk getting a new shirt for Christmas while wearing a ripped one is, really, sheer genius (and if you can find it for sale somewhere, please let us know!).
9. Star Wars Holiday Waterball Ornaments
How else could you create a miniature snowfall around the disembodied head of Chewbacca, Darth Vader or C3PO?
8. Cardboard Skull Wreath
Sure, it’s nontraditional. And yes, it’s a bit on the macabre side. But if you’ve ever wanted a way to show your Christmas spirit by decorating while at the same time proving that you’re a rebel against mainstream tradition, you could hardly find a better way. Plus, it’s really cool.
6. Flying Spaghetti Monster Ornament
If the religious aspect of Christmas isn’t that important to you, or if you’d just like to be inclusive of other belief systems, why not include an image of His Noodliness on your tree?
5. Firefly/Serenity Reaver Ship Ornament
Because nothing says “Christmas” like a ship full of violently insane cannibals.
4. USB Computer Decoration Kit
Computers are such significant parts of every geek’s house, it seems natural to decorate them, too, doesn’t it?
3. Cthulhu Plush Wreath
Ignore the fact that Cthulhu is essentially the exact opposite of Jesus — in this depiction he’s green and red and looks like a wreath. How better to say “I’ve got the Christmas spirit, but that hasn’t caused my sense of humor to untwist?”
2. Darth Vader Nutcracker
And you thought he was tough when he remotely force-choked Admiral Ozzel in The Empire Strikes Back. Now he can crack your nuts, too! (Actually, we figure he probably cracked a lot of nuts, but George Lucas just didn’t put that in the movies because it would have made them less family-friendly. Seriously, though: Choking is all well and good, but then someone has to clean up the corpse, right?)
1. Yoda Tree Topper
Be sure no Sith lords will attack your tree, you can. And you know, in Empire, Luke probably thought Yoda had a stick up his … but we digress. How awesome would this look on your tree?
[Note: This post was originally published in December 2009.]