You May Want The Pirate Life – You Just Don’t Want The Book

Back in September, GeekDad hosted Pirate Week with pirate-themed posts culminating in International Talk Like A Pirate Day.  We had a lot of fun.  One of the results of that week was getting a review copy of The Pirate Life, Unleashing Your Inner Buccaneer written by John Bauer and Mark Summers, the creators of International
Talk Like A Pirate Day.

I figured the book was meant to be humorous, so I started reading and just a few pages in hit this gem:

These days, people just seem unsatisfied – with their jobs, with their bodies, with their lives.  And it occurred to us that a little pirattitude may be just the thing to break the cycle.  It also occurred to us that we could make a little beer money by writing such a book.  Our goal in the pages that follow is to help you find a lifestyle that offers the zest, freedom, romance, and excitement of a pirate without the inconvenience of being driven away in the back of a police car with your pants bagged as evidence.

My hopes were up through the first few chapters…

The book is styled (somewhat) as a self-help book complete with personal/group discussion questions at the end of the chapters.  It also interrupts the self-help style of the chapters from time to time to allow you to build your own pirate story (going off the premise that there are so many romance novels on the shelves because they follow a predictable, multiple choice framework and that the romance novels are cranked out as fast as Jimmy Dean makes sausage).

The humor (most of which is not suitable for children) soon grew stale and I found myself in the predicament of choosing to continue to read this book or watch dumb cat videos on YouTube.  Dumb cats won.  About a third to half way through the book, I put it down…and there it sits unread…with no desire to pick it up and finish.  To quote
Dorothy
Parker… "This book should not be put down lightly — it should be thrown with great force."

There are no reviews of the book at Barnes and Noble, and it would appear the Amazon reviewer (singular) agrees with me.  A single review of a book at
Amazon should tell you something right away – particularly when the book has been out for nearly half a year.

Wired:
a couple of fun-loving guys who created a goofy day to celebrate that has caught on in the last couple years.

Tired:
the book The
Pirate Life.
You won’t want to read it and can’t share it with your kids.

[Image via lulublog]

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